SIGNIFICANT VALIDITY

It's rare that things (life, location, career, persona, pets, loved ones) shift dramatically in one year, right?

Ha. Ha, ha, ha.

(And yet, I'm still a little beneath the one-year marker. Yippity skippity for this girl. Also, I best be preparin' for whatever is bound to arrive in the next seven days. Merde.)

Given the momentary circumstances (Read: I'm at work.), I'm left unable to provide a complete and valid retrospective of the last eleven months and twenty-something days, but it is high time for a breath or two of recollection, not to mention some good ol' self-serving clickity-clack of the keyboard. "Therepy," so to speak.

Prepare for the babble, interwebs. You knew this was bound to happen...

FOR THOSE MOMENTS WHEN TYPING DOES NOT PROCEED NATURALLY.

Hundreds of different thoughts have made up the mental framework of this soon-ending Summer Vacation (lest we even dare to call it a "vacation"). I have several dates protruding from my mind that garner some significance. Having not written about them in real-time, I might as well mark them down in my little scrapblog that could:

June 13th-15th: The Tony Awards. All that entailed, and more.

June 20th: Final day of Summer Semester, and the first "top of my class" semester in every course. (Yes, it's my writing. I will brag. Suck it, Jesus.)

June 29th: Project: Apartment (Temporary) Relocation. Take one.

July 25th: The end of something. Something of magnitude. I have no idea what other words accurately situate what anything is in the realm of this something. But it is no longer.

July 27th-29th: Family Disney Magical Time. And, Ikea with Elise.

July 29th-31st: NEW APARTMENT MOVE-IN! Probably the most exhausting few days, yet the wonderfully rewarding feeling of being in a comfortable, enjoyable space that belongs solely to me and a gay.

I fully understand and comprehend that the entirety of August up until this point is missing, yet I have witnessed no landmarks along the way that signify dates of importance. Should my past suddenly alter, I will be sure to make accommodation within this post.

Tonight seems as good a time as any to tap out some lingering thoughts of absolutely no consequence...

...and, interruptions.

MY LIFE IN PARTS OF SPEECH.

There are parts of me that have absolutely no idea how to be:

Thoughtful.
Considerate.
Loving.
Compassionate.
Philosophical.
Spontaneous.
Vile.
Intuitive.
Narcissistic.
Flirtatious.
Romantic.
Beautiful.
Soulful.
Precocious.
Tragic.
Positive.
Unbelievable.
Neurotic.
Lovable.
Unreasonable.
Ruthless.
Carefree.
Overwhelmed.
Joyful.
Needy.
Occupied.
Lonely.
Dangerous.
Effervescent.
Complete.
Truthful.
Humanistic.
Resourceful.
Endearing.
Cruel.
Commonplace.
Relaxed.
Witty.
Thankful.
Itchy.
Begrudging.
Alive.

Then again, there are parts of me that have nothing better to do in life than to wrap my world around all of these adjectives. (Sometimes, I have no doubt in my mind that I am every single one of these descriptive entities all at the same time.)

Life can be tiring; however, I would not choose to live it any other way.

I WOULD ENJOY SLEEP. I TRULY WOULD.

After the last few days, one can only assume that this is where my brain should rightfully be...

MURPHY SNORES, AND I AM RESTLESS. LIFE IS INCREDIBLY EQUITABLE.

I cannot wrap my mind around the things that spurt out from my heart. Never have I been able to, and the future does not indicate any sudden change in direction (whether positive or negative).
I ache for so many differing things in this world. I wonder if people genuinely recognize that or simply find me to be a scattered mess of a being. Regardless, what hold should their opinions place upon me?

[Editor's Note: There's a part of me that breaks whenever Murphy sinks his unthinkably sharp teeth into my hand. The rationalist inside me stands incredibly aware of the fact that he means nothing by it, yet my emotional core is flimsy, convincing me that I am simply a pathetic and useless chew-toy to him. So, not incredibly useless. Merely pathetic. A much nicer scenario, I suppose.]

[Editor's Note to the Note: It's been a mother-effing long time since an Editor's Note. If I do say so myself. Which I do. Suck it, Trebek.]

There were days previous to this one when I could not cease the banter that scrolled through my brain. On a daily basis, one might fear actual words pouring from my eye sockets; they would dribble down my face, laced with quippy commas and inappropriately long sentences that might seem endless in their miserable quest for greatness mashed up next to literary unorthodoxy. Much like that one. My moments of self-indulgent conversation have not ceased (neither outside of my head via speaking aloud or scribbled on loose-leaf: the college ruled era), but they seem to deposit themselves in a much more infrequent and (undeniably) restricted manner. Is it adult-hood and its multiple layers of adult-y taboo that have quashed my desire to beguile my own presumptuous brain with erratic thoughts, or is it a self-imposed exile to a world where shutting down and ignoring that which propagates inside my lobes is totally okay, dude?
Four lttr wrds seem dumb. ToMe. Noww.

And...I have reverted back to that mind of a twelve-year-old. Ignorant, dispirited, and (luckily for this particular brand of Kelley) as incredibly self-righteous as any adolescent should ever dare to be.

Disgusting. Or, maybe just a step away from that. Yet to be determined, I suppose.
I suppose far too much. Maybe I should just decide every once in a while.
Maybe.
Gah.

MORNING. THIS MORNING, IN PARTICULAR.

I might, very easily if I do say, sleep for eight days at a time. The length of days in this example is quite insignificant, so long as it justifies my enormity of exhaustion. Why such exhaustion? That, dearest no-one, I cannot fathom.
I am incredibly aware that I should be readying myself in preparation for class this morning, but...
No. Not-so-much. I will attend, but that will likely be the extent of my participation. Too much has elapsed in the past seven weeks that has assured me of my minor educational success to have me fretting over the last two days of review and blather.
And now, I really have to leave. Truly. Genuinely.
I don't care.