GOAL FROM THIS POINT FORWARD:

-Accentuate my choices in diction.
-Endeavor to structure myself in a more enticing manner.
-Sentence colloquial grammar to its own metaphorical hell.

-Write the way I used to.
-Sound like a pretentious snot.
(Which is, lest I say it with glee, a manner more befitting my previous endeavors.)

When you got it, flaunt it.

HERE AND NOW.

I've got my cat nuzzled in next to me.
There's an eerie calm and peace about tonight.
Nothing superficial, nothing I can let myself take for granted.
I am back at rest, if only for a little while.
God, I hope it's not just for a little while.
We'll see.
Goodnight.

I almost wrote "goofnight."
I'd have been okay with that.
Goofnight.

THURSDAY, APRIL 17TH, 2007.

I forgot to put these up. Whoops.

Stage Makeup Final, Spring 2007.

I AM EXHAUSTED.

Being in a house where I am relatively unprotected by the boundaries of "room" takes a toll on my sensibilities as a rational human being.
I'm starting to get overwhelmed.
Not necessarily by the chaos going on around me, but by my lack of schedule, my inability to seek genuine solitude, and the creeping knowledge that my thoughts and actions in the most important parts of life are often worthless.

Loneliness exists in other capacities than just being alone.

I've grown up with loneliness. It may be a brand of my own, but it's one I know well enough to have a vast awareness of. I'm tired, I feel absurdly weak in comparison to this entire year so far, and it's not a matter of physicality.

I am mentally exhausted. I need a mental nap, but it's to no avail.
LIFE: GET STARTED ALREADY.

ACCEPTABLE.TV IS PRETTY NIFTY.

Yeah.
I've just been up for about three hours watching these ridiculous shows. It's kind of unbelievable how stupid and simultaneously compelling some of these ideas are, and they leave me with exactly enough to simmer over before cancelling themselves into oblivion. It's lovely.

Acceptable.TV

I like it. Almost as much as I liked "Operation Kitten Calendar."

IT'S BEEN A LONG WEEK.

Home for the summer.
It's only slightly disheartening, I assure you.
By May 28th, I'll be in Gainesville and starting work at the Hippodrome, which should be good fun and a plethora of experience, to say the very least.

For the moment, I'm going to continue to stop feeling sick, I'm going to cook good meals and enjoy the company of family, and that's pretty much all I can come up with.
Boring. I know.

Plenty has happened in the last few weeks, none of it that I honestly care to delve into at the moment. So, I won't.

The end.

THANK YOU, LINKSYS.

Hooray for teensy random wireless signals! Yay!

I'm probably going to lose this connection within a matter of minutes, but it's probably for my own benefit. I have LOTS of work to do in the next few days, most of which I care about only a tiny minuscule amount.
Fun!

Ugh. Portfolio time.

I AM NOT AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL. AND I'M DOWN WITH THAT.

Oh. I miss Internet. For the love of God Almighty, I miss Internet.
I'm typing from 31, watching the eternally-glorious ANTM, and it is the highlight of my television week (Read: The only show I watch. Ever. At all.)
I am entirely enthralled with Natasha, the "might-as-well-be-a-mail-order-bride." And, of course, only because she makes me cry with laughter.
I'm so distracted. Too distracted to type or write anything of consequence.




I miss Michael so very much.
I need to find a way for him to be in my life.
Here's to finding out how to do that.

PINCH ME.

He appeared at midnight in the courtyard with a bouquet of flowers.
I didn't believe it.
He brought me to my window.
He's here.
I am so happy.

EASTER IS COMING.

I don't know why this got me so very excited.
I can't wait to see my Michael.

TOP TEN THINGS RUNNING THROUGH MY HEAD RIGHT NOW.

(In no particular order...)

1. Far too much homework.
2. Conservatories.
3. Moving into my first apartment.
4. Michael coming into town.
5. The first time I will have seen him in three months.
6. End of Spring semester.
7. Preparation for Summer internship.
8. Finding a job that can keep me (relatively) financially sound.
9. Migraines that never go away.
10. Love that keeps me up at night.

BECAUSE I WANT TO.

At some point in my life, I will vow to take a normal picture.
But, not yet.