You never brought me bad news that I couldn't handle. You were an idol of mine. By far, my favorite anchor on any television set. You will be thoroughly missed.
There's nothing to say about me that can easily be said. I suppose that's why they give you an infinite amount of space to type. Oh, excuse me... "Up to 1200 characters." What if I choose to define myself beyond a mere 1200 characters, huh? Perhaps I shall go well beyond this miniature allowance. They'll see.
But not right now.
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