RECAPPING IS A JOY.

Oh, how life explodes in the course of mere days. I feel I've run the emotional gauntlet to its extremes, and beyond that, find myself generally overwhelmed.
Entirely overwhelmed, it might seem.
Exhausted beyond all belief.
Wrought with anxiety over the next two weeks.
Hopelessly devoted to someone I fall increasingly in love with as the days progress.
Unforgivingly conscious of the talented nature of the people around me.
Relatively distanced from any concept of sanity.
A veritable "Sleepless in St. Augustine," if you will.

I broke down in a horrific fit of sobbing this evening. I could easily associate it to an ingenious combination of whatever food and lack of sleep I've taken in recently, but the honest truth is that I have no idea what triggered it. Michael is certainly a confounding factor, but not the causation, I can assure myself. Ugh. I hate that he makes me so damn happy. Perhaps its a sign of insanity to despise that joyous feeling he wrangles out of me, but I think I fear more for its end than for its perseverance. I pray for its insistence. I love him, and it drives me crazy that I've fallen into something this deep and truthful in such a relatively short span of time. It fights against every logical thought in my head, yet I can do nothing to prevent the brutal assassination of such thoughts. Love, it seems, is certainly the more powerful weapon for the moment. And then, of course, comes the reality that he will be meeting my entire family in a mere span of two weeks.
Two weeks.
I don't think I can express how genuinely frightened that makes me. I mean, they will love and adore him, my father will blatantly torment him, but all will be well. I fear that he will despise me after meeting said family, but I think I genuinely have no capability to prevent such a thing. It will happen. What will be will be.
They'll get along fine. I just need to relax.
Sleep in my own bed, along with a cheeseburger and some juice should be just what the doctor ordered. I will be fine. I will survive. I will not break out into hysterical sobbing fits.
There's simply no need for it.
I just need to relax.
Breathe.
Relax.
Calm.
Ooh.
Ah.
...
(That's me breathing, dipwad.)