We're about to leave (Thankfully...), but I want to ask a few questions of this blog before I do so...
1. What is expected from this weekend?
2. Will I ever have the courage to cram a monkey up Fr. Derk's posterior, therefore proving that movie violence (Such as included in the film Bruce Almighty...) does affect the minds of the Youth Of America?
3. What is my favorite color?
4. When will I find some other hobby than writing, singing, acting, and being innately humorous and sarcastic?
5. What did I forget?

Hmm...Sitting here at 9:33 in the morning, packing stuff up from the office to try and get everything together for the Rollins CLA retreat this weekend...And, to top off that little barrel of fun:
I was just informed that I'm on Derk's "list"...
Ohh! I'm quivering in fear!
He even did that little pssss thing to try and catch my attention...I was too preoccupied with the anoying, tiny, fifth graders putting on their scary little performance...
Everything seems to be little today...
Oh well...

If you don't have a copy of Toxic Audio's third CD, Chemistry, buy it here...
And I mean now...

Never underestimate the value of a sign that says "I'm learning, you idiots!" when working with a Permit...

Heh...
Kelley has her Learner's Permit...I can drive the old people around...
Tee hee!
I, technically, could also drive Derk's parked car (An Audi, mind you...) into the church sacristy...Messy, yes. But well worth the look of horror on his squirmy little face?
Indeed...

I'm debating whether or not to email my good pal mentor love...Ugg...Anthony. It's been a while since I've talked to him, and I don't think that there's any bad feelingy stuff, but I don't want to think that I'm going to be imposing upon him by emailing...
Hmm...Since when do I care about other people's feelings?

Or, my Bork-if-ied quote from Jerome' Pradon...
"Vhet is chellengeeng in mooseecel zeeetre-a is thet yuoo hefe-a tu meeentein yuoor ebeelities tu a heegh lefel by cunstuntly vermeeng up fucelly und poot yuoorselff intu zee reeght cundeeshun huoors beffure-a zee coorteeen gues up ; vell et leest thet’s hoo I eppruech my vurk, und ectooelly I du thet es un ectur unyvey ; su meybe-a zee beeggest chellenge-a is tu keep gueeng, fresh und elveys oon tup furm, vhee yuoo hefe-a tu deel veet fery lung cuntrects, tekeeng cere-a ooff nefer getteeng bured und reejoosteeng theengs ell zee teeme-a. Thet is a fery tuoogh cell. Boot it’s vurt it coose-a it teeches yuoo zee crefft, its reeleeties und its shurtcumeengs es vell es zee tremenduoos juy it geefes yuu. Hurty flurty schnipp schnipp! It’s a leeffe-a style-a in a vey, yuoo hefe-a tu be-a fery dedeeceted und fery hoomble-a becoose-a nutheeng is ifer set in stune-a. Und thet’s zee beooty ooff it. Um de hur de hur de hur."
-Jerume-a Predun's qooute-a TO ME...

No, I was wrong...I just get horribly creepy...
Life sucks. I hate people. I am garunteed certain things, and then, they're just brushed aside as if everything was wonderful, and nobody cares about how i feel or what i think or how their stupid actions affect me. I want a friend, and i don't have any. life sucks so baddly right now. i'm so sick of everyone treating me like crap and not caring. i'm sick of being responsible for things people know i don't care about, and i'm sick of people telling me how wonderful i am, and then treating me like the scum of the earth. i'm sick of being such a horrible person, i;m sick of not being loved, i'm sick of life! i want to get out, i want to run away and start over again, i want to change the way the world sees me, and the way the world reacts to the horribly selfish life i lead, i'd rather react to the world by living as a hermit. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out. i need to get out.
(At least I ended my suicidal rant with a gramatically correct period...That's got to be worth a few points in John Edward's book...Well, thank you, December 7th...)

"You try, you try, and you keep trying, until suddenly, you realize that trying gets you nowhere. THAT'S when you pull out the underwater tap solo and hit those bastards where it hurts..."
-I'm really funny. You just don't know it yet...
(That was from December 29th...It seems that I get funnier as time regresses...)

OOH! Do you know what's even funnier?
I can't remember who I was talking about...

Don't you love browsing through old emails in hopes of finding something eventful, or a crazy, relieved emotion that you've been searching for?
I do...
Too bad I just find crap like this...
Blah, I say to thee...I wish I could actually post a diary entry...Saddly, FOD is currently far away (Under construction, or so they're telling us...), and I'm having a bit of withdrawl...I just need something (Someone...) to focus on...Ahh! Damn the stupid keyboard and my clumsy fingers...I wish I was a pianist...Then, I wouldn't have to worry about the stupid keyboard problem because I would spend my hours plunking on black and white keys, not typing out my life story, ultimately waiting for the day when FOX starts accepting my scripts and turns my life into a three-hour special...Ahh...Ranting feels good...
Actually, there's a certian person on my mind...I know who it is, and I feel no need to try and re-iterate his name in plain text. Why is he on my mind? I have no apparent clue...Except for the fact that I miss him. I really do. I enjoy hearing his voice, seeing his face...I can't believe how funny his email was...Actually, it wasn't, but I could just see him trying...
(That was from January 10th...Could I be any more pathetic?)

Well, I emailed Derk...Now, only time will tell if I'll forever be locked out of the new building...
I hope so...
That would just make Sunday nights that much more enjoyable!
Tee hee! This is relatively interesting:
K-Max: Love is not something you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called a Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot.
Kelley: Love could be a Houdini....Of course, love could be giving Kelley the books that she needs for AP Lang...That, too, could very well present itself as love...Minus the nasty gooey "love" crap...

"Remember, it's not how hard you beat the goat, it's whether the goat you're beating is on fire..."
Thank you, Mr. Onion...

I don't think it's possible to truly understand the meaning of "funny" until you've seen one of "Sherk Dudde"'s homilies in Redneck Edition...
"Th' Pearl Neckalace" has a whole new meaning to me, now...
Not just Derk standing up and twirling his curly blonde locks, but a real emotional tie to his childhood, and ultimately, his "fringe" on life...
Nevermind...It doesn't want to work...
That's alright...
Heh...

Alright...I think I'm heading towards the Church, so as to crush the hopes of all who wished to abduct me, or to suprise me with an afternoon of sunset strolling, blah, blah, blah...
Heh...
Goodbye [Everyone who reads this], me!

Who wants to see APeX's site in Pig Latin?
How about Redneck?
Or Swedish Chef?
Elmer Fudd?
I do...

Another of my favorite quotes from the site:
"I can singing and dancing." -- On a toy gorilla.

That little diddy was thanks to Dave, and his fantastic researching skills...
Oh, and I guess the site itself, too...

Jane Eyre
By Charlotte Bronte
Ultra-Condensed by Samuel Stoddard
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

(People are MEAN to Jane Eyre.)

Edward Rochester
I have a dark secret. Will you stay with me no matter what?
Jane Eyre
Yes.
Edward Rochester
My secret is that I have a lunatic wife.
Jane Eyre
Bye.
(Jane Eyre leaves. Somebody dies. Jane Eyre returns.)

THE END

Update from the last few days:
-School is over.
-I saw Rene' being his oh-so-sexy self at SAK on Saturday night...(There were two tickets left when Elise and I got to the line...We needed five...My parents and Daniel, Rat-Demon of the Universe, forefitted theirs so that Elise and I could watch...It was touching, actually...)
-I went to MGM yesterday and made fun of our good friend, The Beast..."Grr!"
(Breif note to convey that Kelley finished her D&A class, and that now, she can go get her permit and drive people with the assistance of a 21-year-old licensed driver...Fun.)
-I made a "To-Do" list on a napkin...
-I've already done two of the things on that list...(To finish the class, and to update on this lovely little blog...)
-Something else, I don't honestly remember what...
OK...I think that about does it...
I'm going to see Bruce Almighty this afternoon with Celeste, so, I'm hoping that it will be extremely halarious...Otherwise, Carrey will die...
And I mean that in the nicest way possible...

I have an entire four minutes left on my Drug And Alcohol Class (Free samples!)...
Why won't it just end?

Ehh...Ehh...I don't think I can breathe...
I just heard James Barbour singing "Sirens" LIVE...I think I'm going to melt due to the sheer giddiness this is instilling within me...
Hold me...

I enjoy downloading Nathan Lane songs to such an extreme degree...He's so funny...
Also accounting for his status as my Musical Theatre God...
I think I can't count the amount of joy I hold from hearing Nate and Greg singing "I Feel Pretty"...Tee hee! Luckily, there's nothing interesting on the TV God this evening, and so, I will type...
Ooh! Not to mention, Ruben won, and I will never say another thing about American-Crack-Idol again...I'm just proud that there's still some justice in this world...
I don't want to listen to some geek singing...
*Hides her Robbie Williams CDs...*
*And her Jerome Pradon stuff...*
*Guess the Glen Carter songs have to go, too...*
Eeeeks! OK, I give up, let the dorks make music...
*Puts her CDs back up on the desk nonchalantly...*
Last night, instead of the thrilling romp to SAK, we headed over to MGM Studios, and played around for a bit...
-I scared one of the Tower Of Terror workers...
-We rode the Rockin' Roller Coaster seven times in a span of about ten minutes...
-My father lost his hat twice...
-I went to see the Beauty And The Beast Stage Spectacular and had to teach the Beast how to roar...He was like a kitten, holding his paws up in the air and going, "Raw!"...
-I was soaked at Fantasmic...
-We had dinner at the ESPN Sports Zone, and I find myself suddenly craving a cigarette...Must be the plumes of smoke we were forced to sit underneath...
Agg...I'm listening to Tony play Judas, and he sucks...
But I'm trying to be nice about it...
Yeah! I just found a pre-Broadway version of "Sirens"...A La Jolla "Sirens"...
Mwahh!

High ho! High ho! It's off the line I go!

I don't think I've linked to them, but neither Gene nor Brad have responded to my deliberate pleas for attention in...Oh, the last month or so...
I really miss making fun of Gene...And Bradley? Brad is just odd. But in a fun, dorky way...
Just don't ask him what "patronizing" means...
Or what gender trees are...
Aggh...

Once again...Rene' signs on, but I just don't have the courage to profess my undying love...
(Heh! As if I could possibly love someone other than Gene Wilder! Silly Kelley!)
Actually, I think I'm in the process of convincing my parents to go see the show with me tonight, and I DESPERATELY hope that they'll say yes...Because I need a Toxic Audio fix...
Backel really pissed me off during class, so I'm just hoping that I can use that little high to make me feel better...
If not, at least I'll get to go on Saturday night...With Elise...
(I hope she doesn't try to molest Paul the Spaz like she did at Districts...That could get crazy...Especially if his wife is there...)
Tee hee!

Going to Kimball's class, so that I can in-turn skip and go to Stagecraft...Tee hee...
Her name looks so much better like that...

I really need to stop posting little one line entries...But I feel bad looping things together...I mean, the Gap ad holds precedence over everything else I've seen this morning...
(You can tell it's been "quite some morning" when the highlight of my day is a Producers Gap ad...)

AHHH! Sexy Roger, Nathan, and Matthew, all in one little photo...I'm so happy!

Agg! How adorable is my little Roger Bart? I wish I could have seen him as Leo...

Cake or death?
In total honesty, I want both...

How do I have a 100% A in Newspaper?
Lots and lots of cars...
I washed them...
All...
Boo-yeah.

There's a random guy crawling under my desk at the moment...He's acting like a spider...
And suprisingly enough, I'm OK with that...
Newspaper...
Heh...

How stunningly gorgeous are these two men...I swear, Luke (Scott Patterson) and Max (Scott Cohen) are my only two reasons for trusting TV anymore...
Maybe I just need more Scotts in my life...

I thought that this was relatively funny...I mean, I might as well show my pride somehow...But why can't there be something a little less...Girly?

Heh...Chris is currently sending me wildly funny pictures of Thespian Inductions...
(And here goes my rant on the corrupt Lake Howell standards: He earned 90 points this year...90. In one year. There's no way in hell that it's possible...Someone else earned 320. Three hundred and twenty points...That's 3,200 hours of work...Yeah, right...)
Thank you Mrs. Backel for showing me the light...

I learned a new "method of living" tonight, thanks to my good friend, BG...
A.P.A.
Namely, Aknowledge, Pray, and Act...
It makes me think...And smile at the same time...
(Before I forget, I'll use this to remind me to congratulate Laurin on her Confirmation tonight...I'm so proud of that kid...)

Heh...I made a few signs of my own...
Dave would be proud...
Oh, and I almost got up the nerve to instant message Rene'...
But I didn't...
Oh well...I must go finish my Conics project...
Gag...

I sit here smiling as Jen basks in the glories of Reliant K's remdition of "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything"...
Ahh...

I don't know why, but it seems as if my journal has refused to work correctly...It also seems as if Mrs. Williams has run off with our papers, never to be seen again...
Ironically, the first one is making me more upset...
Hmm...

Banquet...
What can I say? I didn't win "Best Actress" (As if I was going to! Ha! Leah is still alive, and I have to remember that I will never succeed at recognition (Whether deserved or not...=0) untill she's graduated...That is, if I'm a favorite...), and Katherine won THREE of them (Best Techie, Best AD/Rehersal Secretary, and Best Thespian)...I'm so happy for her...She's the only one who really deserved the awards, and so I'm glad that she was finally given her moment in the Lymlight...
Yea!
But the best part of the evening was Junior Entertainment...It was so funny, and I was laughing harder than I have in a long time...Luckily, Anne doesn't hate me (Completely, that is...) for playing her a bit over-dramatically...
And then, of course, there was Equus on Ice last night at SAK...
I have never, ever in my life experienced something like that show...I was laughing so hard, I was ready to pee. And then again, Toxic Audio and the SAKers made me feel so comfortable and at peace, I wanted to lay down and relax in that nasty red stadium seat...There weren't actual horses, but there was "Horses Ice Skating" protesters (Also known as Brendan and his gang of cohorts in whacky wigs singing made-up horse protest songs, and posters that said things like "SAK= Stable Animal Killers"...It was amazing...)
My favorite moment for the month: Sitting on the end of our row, and having both Rene' and Jeremy sit next to me in the middle of "Stand By Me", as they were singing (And singing to me, if I may add...). It was the most shocking moment, and yet, it was amazingly beautiful...I wanted to leap on both of them and have them sing to me forever...
Ahh...I love Toxic Audio...
(No, I just love Rene'...)
(No, I love Toxic Audio...)
*Editor's Note*-She really does just love Rene'.
-Ed.

Alrighty...Time to take the English exit exam in Kimball's class...
Hope I don't fail...
*Add a big, over-obnoxious wink, there...*

(In case you realized, I just figured out how to put hyperlinks in my journal...)
(And I owe it all to him...)

And here's the picture that confirms the true need for Reconciliation...

This is by far the most devout pledge to Catholicism I've ever seen...

For hours of fun with a simple, family favorite character, click on the link!
And my only question is, "Where's Waldo?"
(Don't click on the aborigine...It's tempting, but don't give in...)

ARG! My entire, three page long-ish, post just was deleted by my clumsy little fingers...
I hate computers...

(How sad and pathetic is it that I just put that whole thing to music...I made an operetta out of it...Good God, I'm weird...)
(And worse than that- I'm still playing the music around in my head...I've already titled it...)
Kelley's Lyman News- The Musical- "The Spread Search"

Lyman News- The Musical
(Our scene begins as the search for a lost spread becomes apparent to the students, and a wary class sponsor demands that the pages be found.)
"Where's the page?"
"What page?"
"Where's that stupid page"
"Which page?"
"My page?"
"NO!"
"Is it her page?"
"Jen!"
"Where's her page?"
"Did you do something with Jen's page?"
"I don't have Jen's page."
"Well, who does, then?"
"Ehh..."
"Who's got the A&E page?
Anyone?"
(A hushed silence falls over the newsroom, interrupted only by the sound of my keyboard tapping, and an occasional yawn from the sleeping Kareem. We resume our banter.)
"Alright...
If I don't see that page in two minutes,
Someone is going to fail this semester,
And I'm not kiddin--
Oh. There it is...
OK, then,
Back to work!"
(The end.)

Heh! I was inducted last night...It was a really nice ceremony, complete with mismatched paper table covers, and Whit lighting my candle and then trying to blow it out...Which I was cool with (Even though I hate Whit)...I was ecstatic...And, I got a star...
*Smile...*
Chris came with me, and it felt really good to be loved...I needed someone there last night, and who better than my not-so-brother-ish-brother? He took a million pictures, though, and I think my friends have become as attached to him as I am...I can't believe he's leaving in three months...But at least he'll be in state for college...
Dumb Seminole...
I'm still feeling a little sick from last night...The last thing I needed to see was Fr. Derk...And yet, somehow, he managed to annoy me just to the point of throwing a needle at him (Although, the needle was attached to a carnation, so technically, it wasn't going to hurt him...Much...). Then, he told me that he had cooked for the bishop, and I accused him of "looking for another job by way of poison"...
He didn't like that accusation for some strange, odd reason...
He then proceeded to throw the needle-y flower at me...And I ran.
I'm currently NOT doing my job as Business Manager, and I don't really care, honestly. Williams has given me enough crap over the last month, and I, single handedly (With the help of K-Max and NatCos, I add), earned our staff over $300. So...She can go away now.
I'm sitting here, and K-Max has completely fallen asleep on my desk...Fun...I love that kid...He's so funny...But he's not feeling well, so I'm worried...Oh well...
I think I need to memorize my monologue...Dern Backel...

(This is from Sunday, for all of you avid readers...Nevermind...I'm the only one who ever looks at this...)
Dumb Elise decided not to make an appearance yesterday, so I went errand-running with Mary...Which was actually rather fun, to be totally honest...We went by this Christian book store to try and find these pins she was looking for...Which, of course, means that I spent time gazing longingly at the Reliant K CDs (They just put out a new one, by the way, and it's phenomenal..). And, fate of all fates, Mary bought three of them for me (Ok, so two were albums, and one was a single, but the single had Larry The Cucumber singing "Breakdown", so it was well worth the two dollars...).
Up to the infamous check-out counter I go, and the stunningly roadie-ish looking guy says that it's probably the "greatest single purchase of music he's ever seen"...
That makes Kelley smile...
And then, of course, we had our Basket Case party last night...That got a bit insane...But it was nice to see Mike again without the ever-so-popular Anne attachment...We watched "The Boondock Saints" (AMAZING FILM!!!), and then moved into the first installment of "Basket Case" (Mike still won't believe that there are actually three of them...): It was even funnier than I had expected it to be...One of the worst attempts at a horror film known to man...
But it was funny...That makes Kelley smile, too...
Now, I'm in St. Pete with the rest of the family, and they've just brought in the ceremonious Smith Family Mother's Day Meal, consisting primarially of Chinese food from this little place on 4th street...If that's not tradition, I don't know what is...
Alright...I probably need to go claim my egg roll before Rachel gets it...
(The irony of that statement is that Rachel, who is most definitely loved and adored leaps and bounds more than me, is my aunt's German Shepard....
What a cold, cruel world!

I finished my draft for the Extrinsic monologue thing for Drama...And it's creeping me out...
I'm a sophomore in high school, contemplating whether or not I'm actually cheating on my fictional husband, who can't discover that my fictional lover has made me fictionally pregnant...
This is the kind of education we Drama students pride ourselves in recieving...
I need a fictional triple espresso...

Seems like I'm set for Judas Iscariot tomorrow...Character Day will be the most interesting event of the year, I think...But I'm excited...
Who wouldn't mind spending a day as the man who single-handedly brought about Christianity by way of murder...
Ok, maybe not the best role model to live by...
But I'm working on it...
(Evil laughs...)