UNTITLED.

I spent nearly two hours yesterday morning with someone overly dear to my heart, obviously, in an overly sappy and pathetic way.
Organizing FCAT books.
It is not that I fear separation or detachment from this person: to an absurd degree, I think I desire it, at least for these next few months. There lies something within friendship, something within the level of complacency in relationships that deteriorate the attractive edginess of first impressions and respectful interaction. That gradual degregation is the integration of something even more costly, yet undeniably sweeter as blooming friendship later unfolds unto its wilted, yet strangely attractive presence- intimacy. "I was for a while troubled with a haunting fear that if I handled the flower freely its bloom would fade- the sweet charm of freshness would leave it."
Yet it has hardly left, an angle held at least on my end of the emotional spectrum. I've found a mentor, yet feel undignified in claiming this person as such, due to the similar status they hold within the minds and hearts of others more qualified to do so. They are aware of this, as am I, to an even fuller degree this morning than I last night feared. How detrimental it is to claim as a guide one who has already begun leading the journey for so many others! Must I take up new root in some other shore? Find the longing of my soul content in some other being, some other new, refreshing presence, much unlike the one I leave for more to bask beneath?
(How Shakespearian this tragedy seems to one unaccustomed to my passions!)
Yes, the separation is essential. Natural. Progressive. Yesterday was an exercise of my emotional faculties and stamina; the coming weeks will test my intellect beyond anything an instructor could inflict.