OH, GOD, WHY MUST YOU TAUNT ME WITH ALAN RICKMAN?

Isn't the fact that Nathan is gay enough torture? Oh well...
I just finished watching Dogma, and never before have I wanted so desperately to leap on an actor and loudly declare that he would have no hope in saving himself and might as well just give up and live with me...But beyond that, I found the movie touching, and religiously philosophical...It was intriguing...I want to go back in and fast forward to the last scene where A-Dawg has his hand on the "now pregnant Bethany", leading to the part where Kelley almost sends herself into convulsions over how godforsakenly sexy the man is...
Too bad he's old...
And "attached"...
And Alan Rickman...
And sexy...